Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
