But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
