I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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