he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
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