Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize