It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
