woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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