Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry iwouldfthatsu hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck

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(212): View more from New York

You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.

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(801): View more from Utah

the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..

(614): View more from Ohio

ya and it worked didnt it??

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(609): View more from New Jersey

why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?

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(817): View more from Texas

I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong

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(463): View more from

I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.

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(863): View more from Florida

Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first

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