Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
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