He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
