yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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