I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just gift wrapped bread.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
