No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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