Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize