are you still at the devil's house?
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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