When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
what day is it and did you see me today?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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