so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Randomize
