You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
