I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize