she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
