If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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