If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
