im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
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