he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
