I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
