she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
