Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Are my feet made of real feet?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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