Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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