Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
