dude i'm inner monologue high
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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