your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You may now shotgun with the bride
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
