Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
It was confusing and full of hummus
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
