I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Randomize
