at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
