Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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