i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize