I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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