The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
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