hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I CAN MOONWALK!
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
