whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
