if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize