Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
