barbara walters just said penis...
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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