I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We need to get me chipped asap
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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