Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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