is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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