That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Randomize
