my mouth tastes like poor choices
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
she smelled like a LAN party
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
