yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize