I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
we should paint friendship bongs
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